I couldn't resist. That whole "25 Things" meme was just too cool.

So I revealed My own list of "25 Things About Me" to one of My favorite disciples, Raffi Shahinian, and asked him to post it on his blog.

As he always does, Raffi heard My Words and obeyed faithfully.

So, in no particular order...

1. I love karaoke.

2. No, My parables were not meant to be reduced to propositional statements. If I wanted to express Myself in propositional statements, I think I could have done that.

3. Yes, I fully realize that the guests at the wedding at Cana were already drunk. That's not the point.

4. Favorite condiment: Mustard.

5. Those things I said about money and carrying crosses, those weren't metaphors.

6. Favorite food: figs. You don't wanna see me around a barren fig tree. It's not pretty.

7. What in My Father's name did I ever do or say that led you to believe I wanted you to gather in a building one day a week for a few hours and conduct rituals in My name?

8. I love you all, but that Paris Hilton chick really gets on my last nerves.

9. Yeah, that thing you sensed that one time you did that really awful thing to that buddy of yours, that was Me.

10. Trust me on this one. You don't fully get me.

11. I'm not too pleased with you Americans.

12. Let me say it again. Listen closely this time...ALL authority in heaven and on earth has been given to ME. Not SOME authority, and not to anything/anybody else. Get it?

13. Favorite wine: 26 A.D. Herod Vineyards Pinot Noir, Galilee Coast

14. Best piece of advice: Don't believe everything you read about Me.

15. Favorite Christian of all time: Mohandas Gandhi.

16. John really did pick 7 of My best pieces of work.

17. I weep, I hunger, I feel pain, and joy.

18. This might surprise you, but I'm not a big theology buff.

19. Second best piece of advice: Wanna learn to be more like Me? Hang around smart people do-gooders priests children.

20. You should see some of the stuff Paul wrote that never made it into The Book. Love that guy, but he sure had some issues.

21. Wanna know what's its like trying to communicate with you guys? Well, imagine trying to explain microeconomics to a 5-year old. Now multiply that by 70 times 7.

22. Saying I wish I'd thought of: "God loves you. Everyone else has a wonderful plan for your life."

23. I can't believe so many people missed the point of that "Render unto Caesar" thing. I thought it was obvious, but, oh well...NOTHING WORTH ANYTHING BELONGS TO CAESAR...DUH!!

24. Yeah, that thing you sensed that one time you did that really beautiful, loving, self-sacrificial thing to that stranger, that was Me.

25. Did I mention how much I love karaoke?

Grace and Peace,
Jesus
c/o Raffi